Thursday 9 October 2008

Then there's my super phwoar-away Daily Mail!

Fearless reporting in The Fist! While some distract us with the Lebanese peace process and economic downturn, The Fist deals only with the big questions.

Today's big question?
  • Is Lindsay Lohan's bust too good to be true?

Fortunately the Fist found precious space to unravel this most perplexing mystery. Through the medium of photography obviously...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well these are the issues that the average punter does indeed care about - a certain belfast daily newspaper is known for its love of Norn Iron models pouting, preferably while draped over a car/motorcycle to get the attention of readers.

Indeed the best selling paper in the UK have their daily nubile hotty baring her breasts - what the readers wants, whether its hotties or 10+ pages of random GAA musings, the reader, erm, gets.

Sure its not like the world economic system is about to collaspe or something....

blank said...

Ah, don't get me wrong Shufflinggeisha.

In this multi-platform media age, I know I like to get my daily news fix through the medium of The Sun's News in Briefs column. (Every day a big issue is discussed by a hot-bird from Essex who's wearing briefs. Ergo, News in Briefs. Geddit??)

Could you extract the nubile hotty from our great British newspapers? Would you want to?

Nah, but the Daily Mail hasn't even managed to put together the papparazzi caption. Something like:

'Lindsay Lohan, drunk, 22, shrugged off recent negative speculation about her love life yesterday as she showed off the curves that made her a superstar. Troubled Lohan appeared to be relaxed as she enjoyed a stroll in the park yesterday. 'Her bust is just too good to be true', said one onlooker.'

I need my oogling qualified by the semblance of a news story. But no! The Mail insults me with a 'whey-hey, great bazookas luv' headline and a pic of the aforementioned bazookas. I feel short-changed.

Still, in these troubled economic times, it does wonders for national morale when certain Belfast dailies do the 'hotties in ferraris' pic. One plunged a naked former Miss NI into a bath of melted to chocolate earlier this week (dunno, maybe to warn about the dangers of obesity or something).